


I Love You, But I'm Terrified

by Geekygirl669



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Comforting Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Established Relationship, Insecure Evan "Buck" Buckley, M/M, established relationship Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-10
Updated: 2021-02-10
Packaged: 2021-03-16 22:00:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,084
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29339451
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Geekygirl669/pseuds/Geekygirl669
Summary: Buck loves Eddie and the family they are starting to create together but a part of him was terrified about what could come.
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz
Comments: 2
Kudos: 93





	I Love You, But I'm Terrified

Buck loved Eddie, there was no denying it. He loved Eddie more than he had ever loved anyone before. And he loved Chris, he loved the little family the three of them had started to build between them.

But there was still a part of him that was terrified everything would end the same as it had with Abby, or any of the other people he had been series with before her. He knew deep down that Eddie wasn’t like that, that Eddie wouldn’t just leave him or break up with him out of the blue. He did know that deep down but at the same time he didn’t know that.

“Hey babe.” Eddie smiled as he walked into Buck’s apartment using the key he had just recently been given.

“Hey.” Buck smiled back from where he had been sitting on at the kitchen counter, laptop out in front of him. “What are you doing here?”

“We were supposed to meet up an hour ago.” Eddie pointed out what a small laugh as he walked up behind the younger man.

“Oh shit.” Buck looked down at the clock on his laptop seeing that yes he had totally spaced out. “I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay.” Eddie assured him as he wrapped his arms around Buck’s shoulder’s leaning down to place a small kiss on his head. “I don’t mind. What’s got you so preoccupied?”

“Just something for Chris.” Buck explained with a small shrug, not wanting to make too big a deal about this For his boyfriend. “Nothing that important.”

“Something for Chris?” Eddie asked taking a quick look at the computer in front of him. “What is it?”

“I’m just trying to look for a present for him.” Buck shrugged again with a small smile pulling on the corner of his lips. “It’s really not a big deal Ed’s.”

“You’ve spent at least an hour looking for a present for my son. Of course it’s a big deal.” Eddie argued as he took a seat on the stool next to his boyfriend. “You still want to go out for dinner. We could just stay in and do nothing.”

“How about we stay in and do something.” Buck suggested with a small raise of his eyebrows. “Because I can defiantly think of something for us to do here.”

“Oh can you now?” Eddie asked a small smirk forming on his face from just the thought of what Buck was suggesting. “I think I might like the sound of that.”

“Good.” Buck couldn’t help but let out a small laugh as he leaned forward to kiss the older man.

*****************************************

For a while Buck’s insecurity’s seemed to go away. The thoughts that he wasn’t good enough or that Eddie was going to leave him stopped. But then all of a sudden they seemed to come right back. And Buck had no idea how he was supposed to deal with it.

“What’s going on?” Eddie asked one night as the two of them were sitting on his sofa watching some TV.

“What?” Buck asked confused as he looked over at his boyfriend. “Nothing’s going on.”

“You sure. I can tell that something’s been bothering you recently.” Eddie explained and Buck couldn’t help but let out a small sigh, because of course Eddie has picked up on this, the older man seemed to be clueless about his own feelings but when it can to other peoples he was actually really good. “You can talk to me if you want to about anything.”

“I’m okay baby.” Buck assured him as he let himself lean further into Eddie’s side. “I promise.”

“If you ever want to talk to me, you can.” Eddie wanted the other man to know how much he was there for him, didn’t want his boyfriend to feel like he was alone, not for one minute.

“Thanks’ Ed’s but I’m okay, really.” Buck wasn’t ready to talk to Eddie about this, he didn’t know if he would be anytime soon but he was glad to know that he could when he needed to. “Come on, were missing the show.”

“Okay.” Eddie agreed with a small nod and a laugh as he turned his attention back to the TV.

*****************************************

Everything came to a head a couple weeks later when Eddie’s ex-wife, Shannon showed up wanting to have a relationship with Chris again. Seeing Eddie with his ex-again made something start to stir up inside Buck.

At first Eddie was pissed, and that was more than clear to everyone who it was even mentioned around but quickly enough, after Eddie saw Chris with his mum again, things between them actually started to get better. And Buck started to worry that his boyfriend would leave him for his ex.

“Okay please just tell me what’s wrong?” Eddie asked about a month after Shannon had come back into their lives, finally having had enough of Buck’s silent suffering.

“Nothing is wrong Eddie.” Buck tried to assure him but this time it felt flat, even to himself. “Fine, something is bothering me.”

“What is?” Eddie pushed a little when the younger man was quite for more than about thirty seconds. 

“Do you still love Shannon?” Buck finally asked with a long sigh sitting down in one of the kitchen chairs.

Eddie looked down at his boyfriend in shock before taking a seat in the chair next to him. “No I don’t love Shannon, not like that anyway.”

“Are you sure. Because I’ve seen the way the two of you around each other and it looks like you are.” Buck explained looking up at the other man with a small nervous look on his face.

“I am sure. I am not in love with her anymore Buck, I love you. I promise.” Eddie assured him as he reached over to grab his hands. “I love you, got it.”

“Yeah.” Buck nodded, he still felt a little insecure about his relationship but Eddie’s reassurance had helped him a little. “So you’re not going to leave me for her?”

“I am not going to leave you for her. I wouldn’t have tried to fix our relationship if it wasn’t for Chris. I am not in love her and I have no plans on ever leaving you Buck. None.” Eddie promised before he leant forward to place a small kiss on his boyfriend’s lips.

“I have no plans on leaving you either.” Buck agreed a small genuine smile appearing on his face. “I love you too Eddie.”

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked this story and I would love to know what you thought in the comments.
> 
> I have read through and corrected all the mistakes I could find but if I missed any that you spotted while reading please let me know in the comments so I can correct them.  
> I am really bad at tagging works so if you think I need to add anything to the tags please let me know in the comments so I can add them.
> 
> I take prompts and story suggestions on Tumbler under the same username or in the comments.


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